Liberal Utopia

What your world would be if everything liberals wanted, they got. Open the door at the bottom of its Elysium fa├žade and take a glimpse of hell.

Bob MqHope


Our dedication to Mexico's favorite senator. (With profuse apologies to a late, true American patriot.)


hanks for the amnesty
Your borders open wide
Let everyone inside
Where rule of law and double fence
Have all been put aside
How lovely it is!

Thanks for the amnesty
Your every document
Is nowhere evident
When we come in and do your jobs
For a wage of fifty percent
How lovely it is!

Many's the time that we cheated
And many's the time that we got licensed
Oh, well, it's swell to know that you're getting reconquisted
With so much harm we've done
Soon you'll all be gone

And thanks for the amnesty
Of lawbreaking that we do
Nightmarish DREAM Acts too
We pay no "fines" but pledge allegiance
To the good ol' N-A-U
So thank you so much

(Copyright © 2008 MqQain-TdQennedy for El Presidente-Vice Presidente '08!, Inc. None of your rights preserved.)

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Arrogant Hillosery and 'Her' Prostituted Endorsers;


or, Why Eliot John "The Launderer" Spitzer Supports Hillosery and Other Prostitutes


r "or, Hillosery Keeps Tolerating Cheating 'Men'"

Hillosery's John
Hookery and "her" Eliot John laughing it up. (NYSlimes)

Or "or, The Whores of New York and Their Beloved Eliot John"

Or "or, Hillosery Thought 'Her' Eliot John Said Sex Sells — Not Sales"

Or "or, Why Money Launderers, Cheating 'Husbands,' and Prostitutes Endorse Hillosery (and Why 'She' Lets Them Humiliate 'Her')"

Or "or, Hillosery's Disappointing Wedding Rings, Prostitution Rings, and Ringing Endorsements"

Or "or, Criminal Cads and the Weak Women They Back Buy Off"

Or "or, 'Her' Nibs' Vast Experience with Crooks, Cheats, and Other Camp-Followers"

Or "or, Hillosery's Dirty Tricks Have Taken On A Whole New Meaning"

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Mqpubliqain Party


Er... I mean, Re-pwnd-u-again Party.

Sen. MqQain taps allies for key GOP posts


isspelling corrected — You're welcome, The Hill.)

Sen. Juan MqQain (D-AZtlán) has appointed some of his allies fellow Enemies of American Freedom® to key GO[-RI]P positions affiliated with the Republiqrat National Committee (RiNoCrats).

(Imprecise description replaced as well — You're welcome, again.)

The Republican't operatives will work at the coordinated campaign arm that serves as a liaison between MqQain's camp and the RiNoCrats. The appointments are expected to be announced on Friday.

A Republidiotarian source familiar with the personnel moves told The Hill that MqQain has tapped Carly Fiorina to be his so-called Victory chairwoman. Fiorina is a former fired top executive at Hewlitt-Packard.

The same multi-Señora Cara Carleton Fiorina who declared that America's Manifest Destiny — the immensely popular movement that drove normal citizens to first believe in then achieve great things for themselves and their nation — was "completely wrong."

"The worst idea in American history is the belief that we were destined to become what we have become," she claims.

That's the American Spirit!

Lewis Eisenberg, a national finance co-chairman for MqQain and a former resigned-in-disgrace partner at Goldman-Sachs, will serve as finance chairman.

Eisenberg was chairman of the Board of Commissioners of the Port Authority during the Sept. 11, 2001 terrorist attacks on New York City and was there for the initial recovery efforts, according to a MqQain statement announcing Eisenberg's appointment in December 2006.

He was also a fundraising "Ranger" for President George W. Bush and a co-chairman of the 2004 Republican convention in New York City.

The same pro-abortion philanthropist philanderer Lewis Eisenberg who made "contributions to Demoqrats such as Walter Mondale."

MqQan you say Party Loyalty? Of course you qan't, Kathy Abraham.

Frank Donatelli, a longtime Republican operative and a contributor to The Hill's Pundits Blog, will serve as deputy chairman.

The same revolving-door lobbyist extraordinaire Frank Donatelli whose bosses at Akin, Gump, Strauss, Hauer & Feld — & Demoqrat Rep. Vic Fazio, too, by the way — also hired former Demoqrat Speaker of the House Thomas S. Foley and former al-Qlinton maladministration trade representative Rufus Yerxa, and whose bosses at McGuireWoods Consulting LLC also hired former Demoqrat Rep. L.F. Payne and Demoqrat Sen. Russell Feingold's legislative director Tom Walls.

Now that's Keeping Money Out Of Politics®!

The Repwn3duqrat source emphasized that these moves are "entirely consistent" with what every nominee does, and no one is losing his or her job as a part of the normal realignment.

Mike Duncan, chairman of the RiNoCrats, will stay in his current position, according to the source.

It's also entirely consistent with Señor Señior Señátor MqMéxiqain's phoniness and his propensity to stab conservatives in the back. (What's that behind you, Mr. Duncan! — ha ha, made you look.)

But, of course, "Everybody Does It... Let's MoveOn™." What do we pissants know?

Carly Fiorana, who nearly sunk Hewlett Packard
Charlie Black, a symbol of Washington insider flacks
Juan Hernandez, the representative of the presidente del Mexico
William Kristol, who thinks illegal immigration opponents are yahoos and morons,
Brent Scofcroft, who says Bush was wrong going to Iraq,
Rick Davis, campaign manager, who tells the conservative base to go to hell, you're not needed.
Mark McKinnon, former Democrat who "won't fight [the Dalai] Obama"
etc., etc.

Not only is M[qQ]ain stiffing the faithful, he has recruited a bunch of inside-the-Beltway hacks totally out of touch with the world and more at home with liberal Democrat party-goers.

It's official. The Republican Party no longer is nor ever wants to even pretend to be of, by, or for conservatives.

It's the MqQainoqratic Party now; and the only thing it needs from any conservachumps is that enough of them allow themselves to be hornswoggled into blindly backing its Demoqrat nominee.

But as the Duke would say, that'll be the day.

Dump MqQain

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The Write In John Ashcroft Campaign


...starts right here, right now.


ational borders in name only as well as amnesty for lawbreaking "immigrants"; taxpayers funding fruitless, aborted-baby "medical" experiments; professional politicians' careers more important than our First Amendment, their demagoguery more important than our Second, their power and greed more than our Ninth; "our" government converting en masse to al-Gore's apocryphal and apocalyptic Church of Climoonbat Changists®; mortgaging our country's economic future to the largest communist dictatorship on earth; billions and billions of ready barrels of vital oil in our own soil untapped and useless; appeasing every enemy, both foreign and domestic; no swift, total victory in this World War; new era of Big Government; postponing the permanent defeat of loony liberalism.

All enemies of American liberty.

The sole consolation is that President Obama won't turn out as effective a one as either Hillosery or Juan Snidely MqQan't III could with that title. The more cursed with ineptness the Obama Administration shows itself to be, the more blessings of liberty we'll see surviving it reasonably intact.

A bonus consolation would be that ol' Juanny decides to resign from the Senate so he can run full time.

I won't say these are the times that try men's souls. We aren't running around New Jersey in the dead of winter being chased by — and sometimes chasing — an army of Red Coats. Although the ones stately attired in red today may be feeling about as blue as our patriot forefathers who were. We may yet, the Lord willing, get an eleventh-hour chance to earn our own Trenton.

Meanwhile, we here in the Utopia return to our regularly scheduled endorsement of John David Ashcroft for president.

But not before writing...

A Liberal Utopia Billet-Doux
 Dear All Those Who Kept Telling Us How MqQain Is The Only One Ahead Of Obama And Hillosery In The Polls,

First of all, congratulations. You got your boy old, old man.

Now is probably not the right time to splash you with a bucket full of MSM-brand cold, cold water. But...

ABC, feeling free to realese the Real Polls™ now that Governor Huckabee no longer poses any sort of threat to your beloved septuagenarian's nomination, has released this jagged, icy, hard one:

"POLL: Obama and [al-Q]linton's [Old ‘Lady’] Lead M[qQ]ain...

"Obama's advantage over M[qQ]ain is the bigger one in this ABC News/Washington Post poll, a 12-point lead compared to [al-Q]linton's [old ‘lady’'s] 6-point edge. M[qQ]ain's endorsement by George W. Bush may not help: The president's back at his career low approval rating, matching Harry Truman in long-term unpopularity."

Ouch. "He who lives by the polls...."

But this but has a but:

"But M[qQ]ain is losing three in 10 conservatives to either Obama or [al-Q]linton['s old ‘lady’ — both of whom he calls 'people of good character, honesty, integrity,' by the way], far more than he likely could stand to see slip away."

Does ABC mean to imply that just because someone repeatedly berated us while stabbing us repeatedly in the back, we conservatives can't be forced to happily forget our still-gaping wounds and his still very, very unconservative serrated knives still sticking out from all our backs, and therefore won't — so long as pigs remain unable to get their pilot's licenses, Hell continues to make Gorebull Waaalarming® look like a night on Pluto, and manufacturers of nose plugs refuse to make any thrice the size of that former planet — "unite" behind El Backstabbo?

Now why would the folks at ABC ever think feel that? Haven't they heard the polls-live-byers tell us over and over and over again that MqQain votes more like a Demoqrat than many, many Demoqrats do? a Demoqrat is Much, Much, Much, Much, Much, Much, Much, ..., Much, Much Worse Than MqQyoto MqQloseGitmo MqQad MqQlimateChump MqGay"Marriage"OK MqProDeathTax MqProIllegalAliens MqQonSelf-Servative MqQorruption MqQain™? Apparently not. ABC probably never heard of Warren Harding either.

So, again, congratulations. No one deserves what we're all about to get more than you.


    Libsareb Raindead


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A vote for MqQrud is a vote for Obama


A vote for Governor Mike Huckabee is still a vote for real hope and real change as well as "for (the) GOP's future."


n the general election, would you vote for the dirty old man or the clean and young one? The senator who's been in Washington, District of Crooks for over a quarter century or the one who still uses a map like normal people to find his way around it? The senator from an extremely lawless-border state or the one from the Land of Lincoln? The cad who cheated on and dumped one of his wives because he didn't like the way she looked after she was mangled in a car crash or the man who's stood by the only wife he's ever known, through thick and thin? Someone born in a foreign country or someone born in the good ol' U. S. of A.?

Texans and Ohioans, that's the choice you'll be giving Americans this November if you vote tomorrow for Juan MqQain'tGonnaWinNothin'.

But you still have a choice and a chance to give us all a much better one.

Mike Huckabee, the former Republican governor of a Southern state, is the only candidate who can win in the general election against a sitting Demoqrat senator from a northern state. The only candidate who has actual executive-branch experience, including in time of war.

A President Huckabee would protect our freedom of speech, including restoring our right to speak out against 25-year incumbents like Juan MqFeingold before elections.

Juan MqImbumbent MqHaveItBothWays would continue to erode and destroy those rights.

President Huckabee would build an actual border fence and repel the invasion of lawbreakers.

Juan MqQennedy MqAmnesty would continue to do nothing except babble on and on about "needing to restore trust."

[MqQain has] proven his dislike for conservatives and would gut us at every opportunity. Why do I say that? Because of three decades of experience as a Republican California Senator and a fifty year activist in the conservative movement. I have first hand, in-their-face experience with elitist RINO's (Republican in Name Only) office holders. They are biblically ignorant, power hungry, status seeking egotists who have no difficulty aiding their liberal Democrat colleagues whenever their arms are politely twisted. The one thing they have in common with liberal Democrats is their dislike for all conservatives, especially those who are Bible-believing. McCain, as president, would stifle the voices of elected Republican leaders and try to legislate the conservative movement out of existence.
Former California State Senator H.L. "Bill" Richardson

President Huckabee would protect the right of every law-abiding citizen to keep and bear arms. Period.

Juan MqQlinton MqGunGrabber would effectively close down all our gun shows — as Only The Beginning™.

President Huckabee would cast the IRS onto the trash heap of history.

Juan MqQrud (D-Mexico) would keep it as well as give illegal aliens Social Security and other benefits using your money.

President Huckabee would investigate and prosecute the New York Slimes.

Juan MqDemoqrat would try to get another "easy" endorsement from that liberal, treasonousbirm rag.

President Huckabee would prevent the unethical harvesting of human embryos for unproductive "medical research."

Juan MqNoPrinciples would support that barbarous practice as well as use your money to pay for it.

President Huckabee would enter into office with a Republican vice president.

Juan MqQrumb would entertain the prospect of being a fellow Demoqrat's vice president.

President Huckabee would lead our country to total victory in this war before he leaves office.

Juan Mq100YearsWar would bog us down in Iraq for the rest of our lives.

Texas, Ohio, the eyes of America are upon you.

Please make the right choice tomorrow for all her people's sakes.

Huckabee for President

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