Liberal Utopia

What your world would be if everything liberals wanted, they got. Open the door at the bottom of its Elysium fa├žade and take a glimpse of hell.

Obama fails again


See what happens, 52'ers Fifty-'Tarders, when you elect a "community organizer"? someone with absolutely no real executive-branch experience?

“At the end of the day, the gøvernment tells BP what to do.”
–Baracrook Øfailure's energy and
  climate adviser Carol Browner

f the globs of deadly oil — you know, the tons and tons and tons of his stuff that's soon going to be washing up in droves on our beaches and mercilessly, cruelly, and indiscriminately murdering our birds and our fish, killing our jobs, and raising our prices, and that's still gushing up uncontrollably after over forty days and nights from the sunken remains of the exploded oil rig which he gave top "safety" awards and extraordinary "safety" waivers to, all because of his extremely dangerous incompetence — now, if those deadly globs of his were communities, no doubt he and his ACØRN accomplices could "organize" them.

Or if his globs of deadly oil were, say, children of Goldman Sachs executives, he and fellow SEIU thugs could send in busloads of his rented angry mobs to terrorize those children when they're home alone.

On the other hand, if his deadly globs of oil were his health care "reform" government-takeover bills, he could ram them down the American people's throats in spite of overwhelming public disapproval (after redistributing kickbacks and other bribes to members of his party in his rubber stamp Congress so, yes, he can buy their yes-men votes, of course).

Then again, if his deadly oil globs were his budget deficits or his mountains of public debt, he could make them grow and grow until they become larger than any have ever been in the history of mankind.

Granted, if the globs of his deadly oil were bloodthirsty terrorists, he could label them "man-caused disasterists."

Similarly, if his deadly globs were Wars on Terror, he could say they're "overseas contingency operations."

Plus, it goes without saying that if his deadly oil were Nobel Peace Prizes, he could accept them despite never having actually accomplished anything to earn them.

Certainly, if such deadly globs of his oil were mad Iranian mullahs or crazed North Korean dictators, he could let them build not only nuclear weapons but long-range missiles for launching them at our allies (while disarming our side of the missile defenses we'd need to shoot them down, of course).

But if his deadly globs were his golf balls, he could putt them around on an exclusive golf course when he should be working (or better yet, use them to quadruple the number of balls that his Top Kill plan Hail Mary colossal failure was ineffectually stuffing into his out-of-control oil gusher with no real back-up plan — the same gusher he sat by and allowed a top campaign contributor of his to create in the seafloor).

Come to think of it, if his globs of deadly oil were candidates for U.S. Senate, he could bribe them with offers of valuable jobs in exchange for their dropping out before the elections (then when he's caught, and after months of non-transparency, rush to get his and their stories straight so it all doesn't sound as criminally illegal as it clearly is, of course).

Or if those globs of his deadly oil were candidates in other races, he could show up and campaign for them in order to ensure they lose their elections (then "move on" again to constantly blaming all of his own colossal failures on George W. Bush, of course).

Even better, if his deadly globs of oil were Osama bin Ladens, he could continually let them escape and remain at-large so, yes, they can come back and attack us again and again.

Of course, if his globs of deadly oil were radical islamic extremists, he could never call them "radical islamic extremists" or any other name one might think of.

But if those deadly oil globs of his were Tea Party attendees, he could always call them "tea baggers" and every other nasty name that, yes, his filthy feeble "mind" can conjure up.

For that matter, if his deadly oil globs were Arizona immigration laws, he could refuse to ever read them (but never let that stop him from going on week after week after week falsely accusing them of "inviting racial profiling," of course)

Needless to say, if his deadly globs of oil were middle class families, he could increase their taxes and keep one in every five of them permanently unemployed or underemployed.

Moreover, if those deadly globs of his oil were birth certificates, he could keep the original ones locked up in secret vaults so, no, no one in the public can ever see them, while releasing only recently-fabricated "certifications" instead.

Nonetheless, if his deadly oil globs were his vacations, he could take them no matter how many immediate crises our country's now facing.

Finally, if those deadly oil globs of his were in the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier on Memorial Day, he could run away to Chicago and hide out rather than lay any wreath on it to honor their ultimate sacrifices for our country and our freedoms, especially in this time of world war.

But because his globs of deadly oil are his globs of deadly oil, he has absolutely no idea what to do and, as anyone who isn't* brain dead can clearly see, really doesn't care.

Thank you, oh, so much, Fifty-'Tarders.

* Don't worry, Fifty-'Tarders. There's not even the remotest possibility that could ever mean you.

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